Tales of Contrast

Here are two recent situations in which I have been involved that might help shatter some general myths about people.

Yesterday, I took a person that uses a walker to a social event. When I dropped him off after the event, I parked briefly in a spot in the parking lot of his apartment building. All of the spots in this lot are reserved for tenants. Rather than park in the street and force my friend to walk a fair distance from the car to his apartment, I usually park in one of the spots close to his door. I am only there for a minute or two. Yesterday, the person that has the spot in which I parked screamed at me for parking there. When I explained that I would be there for less than a minute so that my friend has a short walk to his door, the woman screamed even louder and clearly stated that she didn't care about any extenuating circumstances. Her spot was her spot. It is interesting to note that this woman, like my friend, has a very significant disability. I work very closely with many people with disabilities. Some of them are incredibly selfish. People may think that it is harsh for me to feel this way - that people with disabilities might just be sick of the many challenges they face and are more quick to lash out at others. I have developed a fairly keen sense that recognizes the difference between people being selfish and people expressing frustration. This woman was simply being a jerk. My guess is that her family and others that assist her enable her to act like a jerk on a regular basis.

Fortunately, an incident that took place earlier in the day helped to provide balance. The social event that I took my friend to was a spring dance for people with disabilities that was held at a local sports pub. The pub is very large and includes an area with indoor basketball courts. This is the area where the dance took place. People in the bar area can look through window to see what is going on in the basketball area. There were over 400 people, most of them people with developmental disabilities, at this event having a good time - dancing, eating snacks, talking with friends. I learned that someone not associated with the event was looking at what was going on from the bar area. This man asked the owner of the pub what was going on. The owner told the man that the event was an anual spring dance for people with developmental disabilities. The man at the bar handed the owner his credit card and demanded that the entire cost of the event be charged to his credit card. The owner thought he was kidding. The man was not. My guess is that the charges were over $2,500. The man paid the bill and requested to remain anonymous. Nobody but the pub owner knows the identity of this generous man.